podium to offer a brief statement before she stepped down and renounced the Democratic Party. Complete transcripts are unavailable as most of her staff had quit after last night's tweet in reference to former Director of the FBI James Comey.
Right Wing Friends From High School to receive new presidential medal...
It seems that Republicans are touting an exchange that Comey had with Representative Hirono of Hawaii (where ousted former President Barack Obama claims to be from). Below:
HIRONO: So if the Attorney General or senior officials at the Department of Justice opposes a specific investigation, can they halt that FBI investigation?
COMEY: In theory yes.
HIRONO: Has it happened?
COMEY: Not in my experience. Because it would be a big deal to tell the FBI to stop doing something that — without an appropriate purpose. I mean where oftentimes they give us opinions that we don’t see a case there and so you ought to stop investing resources in it. But I’m talking about a situation where we were told to stop something for a political reason, that would be a very big deal. It’s not happened in my experience.
Right wing friend from high school then posted the last paragraph on his Facebook page and this led to the collapse of the Democratic party and the liberal media elites, contending without comment, that this statement proves without a doubt that Donald Trump is innocent of everything ever.
Robert Mueller, newly appointed special council (we are now obligated to spell it "council" instead of "counsel") was quoted as saying that "...In my many years of service in the Marines, my time as a lawyer, litigator, and as Director of the FBI, I have never been so thoroughly "owned" as the kids say. I hereby resign as independent COUNCIL." With that and what appeared to be a tear in his eye, he walked away, flinging a stack of papers in the air.
Comey, when asked for comment, state simply, "You got me."
Sean Spicer and Kellyanne Conway stood, embracing, in the White House Press room where confetti and balloons dropped from the ceiling. On the balloons were stamped the words "Suck it, bitches, ---DJT"
Legal scholars are bewildered at the simplicity of the post and how Right Wing Friend From High School was able to so adroitly state the case.
"The problem with our legal system is too many words. What Right Wing Friend From High School was able to do was take a comment, REMOVE context entirely and brilliantly whittle the comment down to its base argument thus proving his point. The legal community and the "elites" have been doing too much "reading" and attempting to get meaning from words. This FEELS like a point and that being said, once you get to the point where something FEELS like what you want it say, can no longer argue." said one legal historian.
The fallout continues as Ruth Bader Ginsburg and the other justices on the Supreme Court make only sporadic public appearances. We caught now former Justice Ginsburg sobbing on the steps of the Supreme Court building muttering incoherent phrases about a "wasted life" while Neil Gorsuch was spotted on a corner of Pennsylvania Avenue holding a sign that said "Will Judge For Food"
Right wing friend from high school could not be reached for comment. Rumors abound and many are wondering how often he checks his Facebook account or if it is even his full time Facebook account or just one that he keeps so that he can make comments. We will keep up with this story as developments unfold.
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