In yet another stunning development from the White House, President Trump has seemingly fired Sean Spicer in favor of a newer, more accurate White House Press Secretary, Siri.
Trump said in a tweet earlier today that surrogates cannot accurately report on such a dynamic presidency as his so he has hired Siri to manage his press briefings about the day to day inner workings of the White House.
Trump says, "Only Siri can accurately report on the day to day inner workings of the White House and not get miss any of the details of such a great presidency, bigly."Siri was reportedly chosen for her accuracy as long as questions are posed loudly and clearly and her ability to speak in complete sentences. She even spell checks.
When asked for comment Siri replied, "Only Siri can accurately report on the day to day inner workings of the White House and not miss any of the details of such a great presidency, bigly."
Kellyanne Conway, Rudy Giulianni, Chris Christie, and Sean Spicer are reportedly elated with the new hire. In future public engagements, they will simply hold the phone to the microphone and let Siri respond to the questions. In the meantime, a special podium is being designed so that Siri can respond to reporters questions in the briefing room.
When asked if they will still be drawing a salary for simply walking around carrying a cell phone and holding it to the microphone, Conway and Spicer replied that it was more difficult than the job they have been doing before and implied that they would be asking for a raise.
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