Saturday, May 20, 2017

Trump Fires Yet Another Obama Era Appointee

The president is under scrutiny again for firing yet another Obama era appointee.  Lawrence Lipscomb, the famous "fist bump janitor",  was let go by the Trump administration this week.

It appears that prior to being let go, he had asked for additional funds stating, that, "the sheer number of documents being shredded lately caused him to have to work extra hours."  He has also said that he has had to take additional time off due to back problems from having to lift trash outside of the Oval Office.  "As soon as people come out of meetings with Trump, they load down the garbage cans with printouts of electoral maps and unsigned loyalty oaths."

Elijah Cummings and the Senate select committee are said to be in talks with Lipscomb over what he may have seen while working for the Executive.  When asked if he was the source of the recent leaks, Lipscomb said that he had no desire to be involved but recent reports show that Trump would often pull Lipscomb aside and tell him about his electoral victory and his dealings with Russia after which, Lipscomb would write his own memos of the experience.
We have some exclusive excerpts

November 8th 2017
President Trump seems like a very nice guy and I think I am going to enjoy working for him."

November 11th, 2017
President continues to call me "Lippy" and often will not let me leave the Oval Office.  I am very scared.  Met a nice guy named Michael Flynn today, apparently he really likes turkey, won't shut up about it.  I am a big fan of deli meats myself but come on!

January 26, 2017
Met a lovely woman named Sally Yates today.  She apologized profusely when she exited the Oval Office and kicked the trash can across the room.  She looked at me and said, "can you believe this?" gesturing to the Oval Office.  I suspect she told the president something interesting.

February 14
President Trump said he wants to meet with me after his meeting with FBI Director Comey.  He has told me to wait for Comey to leave and then come in so we can "shoot the shit."  I think he is lonely without his wife.

Comey left, shaking his head for some reason.  Looked at me and said, "can you believe this?" gesturing to the Oval Office.

President Trump told me to come in and locks hands with mine. His hands are clammy and he wants me to look at the electoral map.  Hits button at desk for coke.  The steward comes in and does not offer me a Coke.  We both look down.  Trump tips him with signed electoral map.  He exits.

As of this writing, Lipscomb is unemployed but has received a six figure book deal.  He has been subpoenaed to testify before Congress at some point in June though he has been quoted as saying that he really cannot tell them anything more about Flynn.  He says what he knows, EVERYONE knows and encouraged the panel to simply get Trump in a room for five minutes, give him a Coke, and let him talk.

No comments:

Post a Comment